the moment
please give me the perfekt moment. i want it. now. yea.. i know i can't decide everything, but i wanna do.. :) when school starts again on monday, im gonna stop eating. everything. no thanks, im measured. no thanks i don't feel well. no thanks, i just ate.
for real, i don't wanna be anyone else, but i don't wanna be myselft either. and that fucking sucks.
for real, i don't wanna be anyone else, but i don't wanna be myselft either. and that fucking sucks.
drinking pepsi max.. again
damn, i really got to stop drinking this shit! im gonna die of dehydration!! im high, as usual.. :( not good. and yes, im talking about diabetes.. nothing else! now i wanna die, but not of dehydration
goodbye
goodbye
DAMN IM JEALOUS!
IM SO FUCKING JEALOUS OF MY OWN BOYFRIEND, haha.. fucking sick.
helloo.
i've a sore throat and my chicken diet didn't work so well.. why can't i? P sent me a mail today, im in! i'll be in the beauty contests in April! isn't that great? But he asked me if i could be slimmer at the waist and over the ass, not much.. just three centimeters.. he said it was easy to fix. i hope he's right!
KISSES
KISSES
im off to the city
-
things r going well
yea, i think i can do this.. maybe? haha.. i know there have only been two days! but.. i feel so much better.. :) i'll train soon, i lose more calories!
later im going to meet a friend, and she says she's going to buy new shorts but im sure its gonna be more than that, at least for me.. haha (: shopping makes me feel good, isn't that weird? oh, i dunno ..
everything isn't great then.. i have to fix this situation wtih Z and X. :c
later im going to meet a friend, and she says she's going to buy new shorts but im sure its gonna be more than that, at least for me.. haha (: shopping makes me feel good, isn't that weird? oh, i dunno ..
everything isn't great then.. i have to fix this situation wtih Z and X. :c
lovely food-day
hey :) i drank tea for breakfast and ate some carrots and cucumber for lunch! I feel great. i'll meet some friends tonight, i fix me right now
2011
yea, its a new year now.. but i haven't noticed any difference...
good day, i think
i was swimming today! feels so great! and now i have started on a new diet. i'll show you later :) but today, so far, i've just eaten 137 calories! :)))) and i have ate both breakfast and lunch ;) sweeet, i say! But now i'll fix me cause im gone to the center!
im not gonna lie to you
you are my best friend, diary. i know i can tell you everything.. but this is so hard to tell. i don't know how to say it. oh god, if you're out there... please help me!! what im doing is so wrong, and he should figure it out.. but he doesn't!? oh, i don't understand. I will call them X and Z. and im gonna write everything later.
see yea
see yea
Christmas time
oh, i dunno what to say.. seriosly. im a bad girl, bad bad bad. not only in terms of eating.. fuck. i really hate myself, but i can't help.. i just want him.. all the time. and badly.. i don't mean my boyfriend. i wanna love my boyfriend, but he donen't make me happy.. he dosen't make me feel good. OH GOD, what should i do!? please.. i wanna live with my boyfriend, i don't wanna be unfaithful :'( i want a future with him, not with.. him.
At Cchristmas, i haven't eaten any food .. just cookies. it sucks. i know. but yesterday i just ate about 400 calories. proud. today i have only been drinking black coffee.
At Cchristmas, i haven't eaten any food .. just cookies. it sucks. i know. but yesterday i just ate about 400 calories. proud. today i have only been drinking black coffee.
one thing i wanna tell
i have a sore throat, i just wanna disappear. it's a thing i've to tell you, dear diary.. but i don't know if im ready, i'm a horrible person. Oh!! Why can't life be easy? Why does this happened? :(
clean
puh! keep holding on
feel so sick
i feel like im going to throw up everything i just ate. i dunno if i can live with myself anymore, its a fucking shame to est this much. hate myself. my whole budy just hating me right now. please god.. kill me.
no :(
im not pround about today.. but i wasn't over 600 calories. i think im crazy!
plz..
i just wanna dissapear. now, now, now. please god :'(((
hey, stop ignore me
it was great
yesterday was great, i know i ate to much but it was great anyway! i was with my boyfriend and we did a lot of things.. :) haha.. yea, i think you could guess what we did :)
kisses
kisses
going great
everything's just fine. lovely!
feel good
yeah, i dunno why but i feel good today! i've eaten 300 calories today, i know it's just 5.00 pm but anyway!! feels good :) i've to study now.. sucks. but i got to do it!
kisses
kisses
